RSS

James Durbin on American Idol: The Tale of Fitting a Square Peg in a Round Hole

30 Apr

Courtesy of: newgre.org

Know what  you get when you try to fit a square peg in a round hole? James Durbin. Or any person with Asperger’s really. I could lecture, ahem, inform you on all of the ways Aspies just don’t quite squeeze into that hole, no matter how we position and rotate and twist and turn. Mind you, that assumes our hole represents neurotypicality (and, not to mention, that the pegs want to be shoved into the holes, which they don’t). But, poor James, he doesn’t even get that. He gets people, this blogger included (Fact or Fiction: James Durbin and AS?), questioning his square peg status. He has people telling him, “No, James, you are not a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. You are a round peg trying to fit into a square hole.”

All of this because he disclosed. He pronounced a rather unfortunate word with an attempt at a sophisticated interpretation — one that’s not all that uncommon, mind you. And, then, he acted too “normal”, other than that squinting. Too much eye contact, and coordination, and appropriate facial expressions.

All of this because he preempted possible comments about his mannerisms by giving us an explanation that should have lead us to say, “Ohhhhh, now I get it” or “Good for you, James” or “What a positive example for us to point to”. But, we have to find some way to judge, right? After all, isn’t that the point of the show he is on? If James hadn’t told us, we’d wonder why he was “weird” or “squinty”. If James tells us, we doubt his authenticity, his purpose. Joseph Heller might be tempted to rename his book, James.

This Catch-22 was echoed in my office today with two male clients who have very different views on disclosure. One sees no shame. In his words, “I look normal until I talk or write. Like when I write a check and it takes forever, and others start to wonder, ‘What’s up with this guy?'” The other struggles to admit the diagnosis even to long-time friends. “It will change their view of me. I can’t control that.” James is at the crosshairs of both problems. He’s looked normal, until he hasn’t. He’s disclosed and lost control.

So what’s a square-ish round peg to do in a static world? To start, I suppose, win American Idol.

Advertisements
 
2 Comments

Posted by on April 30, 2011 in ASD in the Grand Scheme

 

Tags: , , , , ,

2 responses to “James Durbin on American Idol: The Tale of Fitting a Square Peg in a Round Hole

  1. Alex

    May 11, 2011 at 9:38 AM

    Please see my response to the blog started on judging if James has AS or not. As a group of people who come together to get support because you are judged harshly by society, and want to find understanding and commmonality, I am shocked and rather disgusted that there are those among you who are doing that very thing to someone who suffers AS as well. James has the courage to get up in front of what is right now most of the world-yes-many people from all over the world are watching him-and perform. And to get THIS reception is shameful, and should prompt some of you to reevaluate who you are as a human being.

     
  2. noccinet.com

    January 2, 2013 at 10:07 PM

    “James Durbin on American Idol: The Tale of Fitting a Square Peg in a Round Hole
    A Shade unDifferent” was in fact seriously pleasurable and beneficial!
    Within the present day universe that’s quite hard to execute.
    Thanks a lot, Trinidad

     

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: